Three Ways Multiple Orgasms Will Help Your Marriage

Three Ways Multiple Orgasms Will Help Your Marriage

Multiple orgasms aren't necessary, but there are a few life and relational lessons we can learn if we can open ourselves up to the possibility of experiencing it.

Most women aren't interested in multiple orgasms, and those that are, are viewed as "sex-crazed" or "of this word". Being interested in desire and pleasure with our spouses, doesn't make us sex-crazed or slaves to the world. Here are three reasons why practicing this phenomenon [multiple orgasms] together can help your marriage.

1. Multiple O's helps you voice what you want and need

I can't think of a more fickle creature than female humans. Please don't misunderstand – it's not a bad thing. It's just true – most women have mood changes through out the month, they enjoy something one week, and hate it the next. Our men aren't mind readers. They don't know that the specific thing their doing is irritating (because couple nights ago, we freaking loved it). We need to use our words and body language to communicate clearly when we need them to do something specific or something different. For example: Don't stop. Go lighter. Go softer. Move down. Move up. It's sensitive, just leave your tongue there for a bit. 

2. Multiple O's helps you learn how to be present

How often do we find ourselves thinking of something else during sexy time or a conversation? It's easy to let our minds wander to think about other things, other worries, or other people. Practice "taking your thoughts captive" and practice it every time your mind wanders. Exploring the world of multiple orgasms will take time and patience. You don't need to worry about the end goal – rather, be aware of what is happening at that very moment. What kind of pleasure and sensation are you feeing? Learn to enjoy what's happening now, rather than what's to come.

3. Multiple O's helps you learn how to sit through the uncomfortable tension

For many women, hypersensitivity of the clitoris can act as a refractory period (a frame of time that you can't be aroused or orgasm) and the last thing you want is to be touched there. It has been said, though, that if you're able to work through that sensitivity, the arousal wave often times comes soon after. Try letting gentle, slow and super light stimulation still happen. Sitting through the uncomfortable parts of our lives takes strength. It's easier to walk away from situations that make us feel weird, small, or awkward, but learning to sit through those moments (inside and outside the bedroom) can be very rewarding.

Let's be open to desire. Let's be open to time and patience in the bedroom, just like we need time and patience to cultivate every aspects of our relationship; sexual, physical, emotional, intellectual, practical and spiritual.

Two things you can start with, tonight

  • Plan an evening of sex, rather than a sporadic quicky. Tell your husband that you want to take your time tonight. Plan together to extend the time spent in foreplay. Tease. Take your time. And be open for more even after you climax.
     
  • After your first orgasm, don't take your mind out of it. Continue to stay in the mind frame of experiencing pleasure and desire. If your clitoris is too sensitive, switch to stimulating the G-spot, around the clitoral legs, or stimulate other erogenous zones.

For more ideas and tips on multiple orgasms, below is this week's episode on this topic.

Things mentioned on this show: